Tuesday, August 25, 2009


I do not understand why I feel this way tonight?? I have been up, unable to sleep and just asking God, "what?". I have so many questions right now...not negative or bad questions, just questions! As many of you know I coordinate a mom's group at Crossroads Christian Church...I love my church, my church family, the ministries I serve in...!!!!! I want more, I want God to use me in amazing ways this year. I want to clearly hear Him and His plans for me! I want to know His will for me and what I can do better, I WANT TO GROW!!!!! I feel like while I was sick and in and out of the hospital God used that time to grow me closer to Him, since then I have been through more personal struggles and I am still seeking and want more. Last week at church we had baptism services, I was blessed enough to actually be standing at the bottom of the little steps and as people's lives changed through this amazing experience I was helping them out of the baptismal and wrapping a towel around their new changed bodies. It was incredible, words do not describe what this was like!!!! I am forever changed by that act of service. I am also blessed enough to be working closely with someone that I consider to be a mentor. I love Pastor Kathryn!!!! This woman has been there for me in my darkest times, she knows the real me and loves me still, she has a heart like His and I am forever greatful that God placed her in my life. This is a woman that I know with all of my being will be 100% honest with me, not to harm me but to help me grow. So here are my questions to my Abba....

What do you want me to do God?
What are Your plans for me this year in Mom2Mom?
How can I better serve these ladies in a way that will bring You glory?
What do I need to do to grow?
I want to be more transparent God...how?
I want to be taken out of my comfort zone...challenge me, mold me, refine me!

Man...I feel better! Not sure any of this made sense...I am blessed, encouraged, loved.....Thanks!

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